Apr 11 2007
R E S P O N S I B I L I T Y
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Well there’s a word you don’t seem to hear much anymore. If and when you do hear about it it’s usually taken out of context or completely misused. So I ask you, what is responsibility? Do we as a society even understand and uphold it anymore or has it become a textbook definition now?
At one message board I post at one member commented on how she forgot to check her pockets and left her ipod in it. When she remembered she called her mom and told her to take it out for her, the mother forgot and the ipod got washed and subsequently trashed. The poster was incensed over the incident and was irked when her mother only gave her $50 towards a new ipod. Other posters suggested the mother was responsible and should foot the bill or at least pay half.
Why? The postee was old enough to do her own laundry instead of asking her mother to do it. But first and foremost she should have checked her pockets herself, if she had been responsible and taken care of her things to begin with that scenario would never have happened. How is it that the fault lies solely on the mother and she should be held accountable? No doubt the woman had other things to do besides keeping up with her grown daughter’s belongings. If that had happened to me I would have felt like kicking myself for not checking and I’m sure my mother would have offered to help pay out of misplaced guilt but ultimately I would have turned her down because it was my fault after all.
Then at another board a postee commented on how he was in a hurry to get to class and parked his car in a handicap parking space despite being anything but handicapped. He had no placard or special plates and is really just too self centered to even consider giving his own grandmother a lift so he can’t even say that he chauffeurs a disabled person around either. This leads us to what happened to him that day. Apparently while he was in class he got ticketed for parking where he should not have parked. He had not anticipated this happening because he knew the people on shift that day for the campus parking and he knew their schedule to boot and knew no one would check that parking lot while he was in class. The only reason he got the ticket was because the person parked next to him called the campus police and reported him.
While he was exiting the building he passed by one of the administrative offices and over heard an elderly gentlemen apologizing for not getting there sooner because he was unable to get a parking space because someone had illegally parked in a handicap space. The gentlemen went on to say that not only was there no other place to park within walking distance he couldn’t walk very far because his knee had been acting up as well so he ended up calling the campus police to have the vehicle towed. When the police arrived a slot had barely opened up next to the handicap spaces so the man took that and told the police just to leave it alone. Apparently the cops thought giving a ticket to the person illegally parked was the least they could do.
Hearing this the guy ran out to check his precious truck and yup, there on his windshield was a ticket. The postee stated he was so pissed off because that “old f*cker” was responsible for him getting a ticket.
Um, no, he alone was responsible for the ticket. He decided to park where he knew he should not park and was held accountable. End of discussion. But no, that wasn’t it. The poster than commented on how he keyed the vehicle next to him and felt justified in doing so because it was what the old man “deserved”.
To top it off several posters commented on how the old man should have “minded his own business” and that he could have just parked somewhere else. 
Am I the only one who can clearly see who was in the right and who was in the wrong here or is my perception of responsibility and accountability skewed from the rest of society’s?
No you’re not the only one. We are not the only one. However, in my opinion, no one can claim having clearly see right and wrong until all is laid before him/her.
She might have been washing her own laundries but on that particular day, her mother decided to do it. It’s just too bad that the mother forgot about the iPod. And it’s also just too bad she forgot to take it out. If it’s one of her prized toys, being utterly upset is understandable.
The dude just have to park the car there or he’ll miss class. If there were other available parking space, the handicap lot would not be anywhere in his choice. But revenge, to some, is sweet. Keying the vehicle next to him is probably the least he could do. What do you think … if the old man knew he’s late for class and that education is very important, would he called the cops?
While the lady deserve the trashed iPod, and the dude deserve the ticket, I don’t think they deserved to be judged because, I believe, we have flaws of our own that needs mending. Only we know what they are. It’s perhaps easy to dictate the responsibilities and accountabilities of others, while the reflection in the mirror could be the only one that is difficult to assess.
But hey … I liked what you wrote
That’s ridiculous. Especially him keying the car afterwards. What a wanker! Who’d be proud and post about doing something like that? People don’t realise how important disabled spots really are.
I agree with Event Horizon’s comment. Both of the people deserved it. You’re right. It’s all about responsibility and taking that responsibility for your own actions. I still can’t believe that guy keyed the man’s car!
Did you tell them your thoughts in the forum?
Regarding the handicapped spot: I can’t imagine people actually supporting that sort of behavior… Even when the only reasonably close spot to park at our apartment was the handicap spot, we would never park there. (Unless we had groceries, in which case we’d move the car once we were done.) The logic… thinking that it was the old man’s fault is just mind-boggling. I can’t stand those sorts of people.
And on the iPod thing, I agree completely. I don’t remember what my response on the board was, but I was thinking almost exactly what you wrote. (I didn’t want to come off as a bitch.) I don’t think I’ve ever expected anyone to replace anything that I’d been irresponsible with.
Event Horizon,
I did not mean to judge them, and if it sounded that way I apologize, however my main gripe was the lack of owning up and taking responsibility for the things they did. Both postees managed to shift the blame, which was their own, onto another person and then claimed that they were the ones responsible for their woes. You make a good argument for the ipod incident, but I have to disagree with the handicap one. The postee who discussed that attends my university and everyone knows parking on campus is atrocious. There are however free parking lots with shuttle service for students that he could have availed himself of. The shuttle, for the gentlemen, would not have been feasible since he apparently had trouble walking and likely didn’t even know of it.
Now while I do believe education is important I also believe that rule abiding is also important. Being late to class does not justify parking illegally. Especially when the comments about knowing the schedule of the people in the parking patrol unit and the people themselves suggest that this is not his first violation and is a continuous and planned affair. =/ I just have a hard time understanding the logic. Although yes, keying the vehicle was the least of the damage he could have done thankfully.
Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed the post
Paddy,
Oh yes, I most certainly shared my thoughts and was called some nice explicits at one of them for my efforts. Your level of incredulity at the guy’s actions equal my own. I had a hard time believing what I had read and the tone of it and then an even harder time reading the responses after it. Really, is it so hard to accept you did wrong and own up to the consequences? Apparently so.
Cody,
I couldn’t imagine ever thinking my mother was responsible in that situation. Hell, if I demanded she help pay for it “sense it was her fault” she would just laugh at me until tears ran down her cheeks. XD
I’m glad to hear I wasn’t the only one thinking that at Vertigo! I remember seeing the responses, and mind you this was just right after reading about he handicap deal, and I was just a bit disgusted. At first I wasn’t going to say anything, for fear of sounding like a bitch, but I decided to go ahead and post my thoughts. Why not, I said, surely not everyone agrees? I’m glad I was right.
Yes, the mentality expressed by those people is disconcerting and mind-boggling to say the least. And to think, I attend classes with some of them. Pity me.